Dumb Turkey

Dumb people got nobody; dumb people got NOBODY. Wait, that's not how the song goes. The song's about short people. And this blog's about dumb people.

People are such idiots. They vote for the wrong person. They never understand stuff. The watch the wrong shows. They ELECTED THE WORST PRESIDENT IN THE HISTORY OF THE U.S.

People are such idiots.

Well, idiots get to vote, too. In fact, I support idiots. Idiots are what make this country great. Here is a list of great idiots:

Homer Simpson
Charlie Brown
Gilligan
Barney Fife
Forrest Gump
Ace Ventura
Kramer
Shaggy (and Scooby, too)

Okay, none of them are real, but you get the point. These are decent people. Loveable boobs. These are the guys who voted for Bush. Or worse, Nader. Damn, we should kick them out of the country. Or off the show.

Why do we hate dumb people? Not their fault, any more that it’s YOUR fault you’re short. Seriously, think about it (all you smart people). Some people are born tall, and join the NBA. Some people are short and learn to bowl. Some people have beautiful voices and sing at the philharmonic. Other people are frogs and sing at karaoke. Some people are white and make a lot of money. Other people are brown and are bombed by the US Air Force regularly. Are the latter people lesser humans? So why do we dismiss people of a lower IQ?

Let’s take the case of Byron Headostraw. Byron came out of the womb a little on the blank side. As a kid, he took a little longer to tie his shoelaces than most. Tried hard. Sometimes got kinda grumpy when the other kids made fun of him, but it wasn’t too often because what he lacked in the brain dept he made up for in the bicep dept. Still, most people liked him. He helped out building treeforts and later fixing your car. Barely got through high school – had to work his ass off in Algebra. Got a job in a garage, married Melissa Hotchest, and coaches little league. Good fishing buddy, sixpack and bass boat, you didn’t even mind not catching anything if he was around. Oh sure, he had some flaws (to your way of thinking). He didn’t like all those illegal aliens moving in, but that didn’t stop him from jumping into the lake when it looked like that little Guatemalan kid was drowning. He doesn’t like gays, but cousin Bette’s all right, and he’s pretty sure about her.

When Bush said, “Fuzzy math,” he’s like Yeah, Right. He worries about doing the right thing, and this guy W seems the same way, too. Besides, Bush likes to fish. Not the best way to pick a president, but why should YOUR way be any better? The point of a democracy is that EVERYONE has their way of voting.

I don’t blame Byron for Bush. I blame the DEMOCRATS. After the election, I kept hearing from the left how STUPID these people were for voting for Bush. What a bunch of IDIOTS! MORONS! Yeah, that’s how you get people to vote for you. Call ‘em names. Meanwhile, Bush keeps on shaking their hands.

You know why Clinton won? He really LIKES people. He really likes Byron. Until the democrats learn to really like Byron, and understand WHY he voted for Bush, they will NEVER win another presidential election.

No matter how dumb the president is. Dumb people got nobody.