Voting Turkey
Bad news in California. We have to choose between an un-elected, ham-acting, over-developed, boob-groping RINO and a bowl of unflavored oatmeal. Who to vote for? Can we survive for four years until Mayor Charisma can come to rescue us?
So I'm going to do the only thing that makes sense. I'm going to vote for candidate of the least obnoxious bumper-sticker drivers. Everywhere I go, I'm going to take notice of the bumper stickers of all the idiot drivers. The ones who cut me off, drive too fast, drive too slow, use their cell phones in the car.
On the day of the election, I will count up all the infractions and whoever has the fewest gets my vote.
This is much more effective than you realize. Since California is going to elect a turkeyhead either way, this plan gives us the opportunity to clean up our streets of poor drivers. All the people who read this blog (both of you) will now have to worry that I'll vote for their candidate's opponent should I catch you parking poorly or failing to merge properly. You will also have the opportunity to put the same plan into place.
We could start a state-wide, even nation-wide era of quality driving. Traffic will move more swiftly, less gas would be wasted, prices would go down, pollution would decline, children would be healthier, forests would prosper, and peace would break out in the Middle East.
Most importantly, it would knock 10-15 minutes off my commute.
So I'm going to do the only thing that makes sense. I'm going to vote for candidate of the least obnoxious bumper-sticker drivers. Everywhere I go, I'm going to take notice of the bumper stickers of all the idiot drivers. The ones who cut me off, drive too fast, drive too slow, use their cell phones in the car.
On the day of the election, I will count up all the infractions and whoever has the fewest gets my vote.
This is much more effective than you realize. Since California is going to elect a turkeyhead either way, this plan gives us the opportunity to clean up our streets of poor drivers. All the people who read this blog (both of you) will now have to worry that I'll vote for their candidate's opponent should I catch you parking poorly or failing to merge properly. You will also have the opportunity to put the same plan into place.
We could start a state-wide, even nation-wide era of quality driving. Traffic will move more swiftly, less gas would be wasted, prices would go down, pollution would decline, children would be healthier, forests would prosper, and peace would break out in the Middle East.
Most importantly, it would knock 10-15 minutes off my commute.
posted by Mad Duck at 3:48 PM
1 Comments:
You should run. At least you propose a plan that will work. More than we can say about these other candidates...
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